Friday, November 7, 2008

Marriage and Food

I love listening to the perspectives on life with my grandmother. She has insight that only 79 almost 80 years can give you. While I was home we were talking about marriage and the compromises you have to make to make it a successful one. That each person comes into the marriage with their own way of doing things but if you are going to have a good marriage then you can't stay the same.

She gave an example of cooking. She told me that as a child you grow up with the way that food is cooked and how you prepare it and so does your spouse. As you start out your marriage you realize that you will need to change a few things on how things are prepared to accommodate the way your spouse likes it and pretty soon it is not the way either of you knew it growing up but a whole new thing.

I grew up eating fried rice the way that my mom prepares it. Jeff didn't grow up eating it at all but enjoyed it when I made it for him. Soon we were adding things to it to see how it would be. We tweaked it and did different things to it that we liked. Now it has some resemblance to what I use to make but it has definitely become our own version.

I think that the same holds true about relationships. We all come into marriage or any other relationship with our preconceived ideas on how it should be. But if it is going to truly work we need to put those down and see what works for us and how to make it the best that we can.

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